A more surreal campaign I cannot imagine, than Obama, McSame and Miss Moose beauty pageant.
E-mail has flooded my box with the drama,
When Palin is cornered, she lies on Obama.
"My fellow prisoners", a Freudian slip?
After the bailout, it's a thought I can't skip.
Evading the Questions and not paying taxes,
The new patriotism for the republican axis.
She came down from Wasilla with such innane chatter, voters sprang from ennui to see what was the matter.
The internet humming in-red states and blue-brought facts,video and lies, even polling from Pew.
Then what to my wondering eyes did appear,
But Carribou Barbie shooting 8 tiny reindeer.
Her eyes were like lazers, her dimples so merry.
Her strategy smacked of swift boats for John Kerry.
Outfitted for battle at Niemans' and Macys',
No silk purse, this moose ear is still a bit spacy.
Foreign policy cred? Yeah you're durn tootin'!
Keepin' airspace in Alaska free from heads like ole Putin.
Hannity and Billo were taking a nap,
Thinking most of the country was taking a nap.
Till an S&L skit said "Media,grow a pair",
To report on the issues and make all aware.
Of the out and out lies the republicans spout,
So the public will know and vote the bums out.
Then all at once streaming from networks and cable,
Were stories, all true, no more deemed liberal fable.
No longer just only for Rachel and Kieth,
Looking under the garbage to find truth beneath.
The straight talk express has already derailed,
Each day it seems one more conservative bails.
McCain seems so weary, in speeches he bumbles,
His ratings, once high, are now taking a tumble.
The left volunteered with their cameras in fear,
Of another stolen election this year.
At Acorn republicans pointed their fingers,
While purging voter rolls in states that were swingers.
The economy, healthcare, Iran and Iraq,
Who wants to discuss them, only Joe and Barak.
With red states tinged purple and purple states leaning,
The right cannot sleep, what with Ann Coulter screaming.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But the election official who stands without peer.
"Why look! It's Jimmy Carter!", I cried out with wonder,
"He's coming to guard the election from plunder!"
"On fairness and Justice, Registration for all,
On Democracy, Colorblindness, please no more robocalls.
On Truth, Full Disclosure of all records that matter,
Let's tackle the issues and stop innane chatter."
His credentials were clean as the new driven snow,
Never could understand why his ratings were low.
The right seemed all covered with ashes and soot,
And republican mouths were all full of foot.
He counted out ballots all snug in his sack,
And gave Sarah Palin a checker for facts.
The putting his finger to the side of his nose,
He cracked his big smile and up the chimney he rose.
And I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
"Fair elections for all,and to all a good night!"
Then I in my T-shirt, and my man in sweatpants,
Awoke from a dream to the news pundit rants.
I exclaimed as the T.V. faded from view,
"I guess I was dreaming, don't you wish it was true?"